bowling

2003-03-18 / 8:53 a.m.

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I dont konw why I do this to myself. I went bowling with some people from work and I was the only one there not in a couple. I think I looked like I was going to pass out. So my dear friend Tim decided it was high time for some booze. Watauga lanes may suck now that its Christian Cosmic Bowling but there pitchers of shiner are cheap. Tim was buying so I was drinking. We waited 3 hours on a lane and drank 3 pitchers of beer. Not a bad average. Oh thats right me and Tim. No one got any of our precious pitchers. The bar lady thought I wasn't real. You have to have two id's to buy a pitcher and I guess seeing my distress Tim just took my license with him when he went to buy. Well evedently many guys carry around extra id's of 21 year girls so she was like okay you and "Jennifer" enjoy your beer. So the next round I went with him and he kept sushing me cause if we appeared to gone they wouldn't give us more.

I succeeded in making his girlfriend hate me cause he talked to me alnight. Honestly we talked shop for hours. Evedently he wants me to be a front tech and we talked about larry, and Ashley, and what I wanted to do with my life. It was nice, but not like a sexual thing at all. Tim is a great guy, attractive, and nice but he's Tim. I think he saw my extreme uncomfortableness and tried to help. He knows how upset I've been and he always tries to make me smile. He is one of the only people at work I can stand to be around.

I dreamed about Brian the other night. It was so real. We were talking on the phone and he was teasing me and telling me he loved me. then I woke up. I just don't understand this universe. I met someone that I truly saw myself with forever and its over, just like that. No lets see if it works just good-bye. Its a cruel world and I maybe shutting myself off from it but thats okay because I am finding I like myself a lot and thats all that matters.

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cabbages and kings