merry christmas

2003-12-25 / 12:24 p.m.

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MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I know some people right now are saying how stupid I am and what a sucker I am, but I'm truly happy. Happy with reservations; but happy all the same. Brian called and I acually talked to him and things escalated at there usual fast pace even though I was determined for it not too. When it comes to that boy I have absolutely no will power, none at all. I blame him for being so damn cute. He has also been surprisingly sweet. I know he hates it when I say that but all the little things he's said and done like calling me at midnight and telling me Merry Christmas (the first person to do so I might add) really mean a lot to me. More than he realizes I think. Don't get me wrong I still have this nagging fear that after Jan 3 I won't hear from him. Its stupid but I guess to be expected, self confidence was never my strong point. I missed him though, I wouldn't even let myself realize how much till I sat across from him at IHOP. It was like a tidal wave. I knew right then that for better or worse I still loved him, and I might as well stop pretending otherwise. Enough!! I will just be ever hopeful and trust him and trust my feelings...

On to New Years. I wish I could spend it with Bri but I'm sure he's got plans. As it is I think that I will have a trivial pursuit/poker/boardgame night at my apartment with a few close friends and a case of beer (for me, my friends hate beer). I figure what better way to bring in the new year.

Anyway,

I hope everyone got what they wanted for Christmas I did. :)

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cabbages and kings